What's the point of having a blog if I never update it?
I had a really great day yesterday. I cleaned the hell out of my son's room, and am now going to attempt to start my own. Part of my clutter problem is that I always think that I might be able to use things in my art. This may be true for some things, but there is no way I could ever use all the crap I keep.
I also don't really make that kind of art...when it comes down to it I am a painter..so all this stuff I think I am going to use is just collecting dust.
Same with my closet..filled with clothes that I will wear when I lose weight. Stuff that used to fit, but now looks to "snug". I have to accept several things here..one..I will probably never lose that much weight unless I drastically change my lifestyle and I really don't think that is going to happen. Second, if I did lose a lot of weight I would probably want new clothes, not this decade old stuff that is cluttering my closet. Thirdly I need to just accept myself the way I am right this second. I have two reunions coming up this year, neither of which I am going to, mostly due to cost and geography, but even if I could afford the time and money I don't think I would go. I don't want this short, pudgy suburban mom jenn be the one that they see. I need to learn to like her first.
I also have two weddings to go to this year, but those people know me as I am now...so they won't see a difference. Although my secret dream is to look like my old self for my sister's wedding. I don't want to be the fat older sister of the beautiful bride. blargh!!!
How is that for an update.